Tag Archives: family

Offering Help to Family and Others

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Advice may sometimes be the help that’s needed.

Monday we mentioned that now is a time for generosity. If you have a portfolio, you’re fortunate. Millions of people don’t, and they may need your help. How do you handle that in a compassionate and reasonable way? 

To begin, you must know how your portfolio functions in your life: do you depend on it for year-to-year living? Or is it for extras like travel, gifts, or luxuries? That distinction is important because if you help by selling investments and giving the proceeds, you reduce future investment income. That’s not the case with income from work—giving part of a month’s income to a relative in need doesn’t reduce next month’s income.  Continue reading →

Signs of Later Life

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Four brothers. From the left, Wayne, Warren (author), Bob, Bill (who is younger and yet to have “senior” health problems).

Over a year ago I purchased hearing aids.

Several months ago I fell down the bottom three stairs in our house and landed with my back against the wall, chipping the plaster. No injury. 

In early October, 2019, my wife and I drove to Maine for vacation. Barbara planned to meet three high school friends in Bar Harbor, and I was hoping to explore Down East Maine, that part of the coast northeast of Bar Harbor. As we entered Maine, I began to shake uncontrollably. After dropping Barbara and reaching Lubec, at the New Brunswick border, I holed up in a motel, alternating between periods of cold shakes and fevers. A few days later when I picked up Barbara, we headed directly home, calling ahead for a doctor’s appointment and postponing a side trip to western New York to visit my oldest brother, Wayne.  Continue reading →

Zen and the Art of Long Marriages

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Last weekend we attended a dinner to celebrate the 50th wedding anniversary of friends. Two other long-term couples we knew also attended, and there were family and other friends as well. We four couples connected through our wives, all of whom were classmates and friends in nursing school many years ago. Our first toast was to long marriages, especially to that of our hosts. What makes them work, we asked? Continue reading →

Death and New Life: Mary Ann and Harper Grace

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One magnolia fading after a full bloom, another magnolia opening to the day

One magnolia fading after a full bloom, another magnolia opening to the day

Yesterday at 3:30 a.m. a dear friend in Alabama passed away from complications following surgery. We were neighbors for several years and our children grew up together. We shared many meals and laughs, helped each other when needed and worshipped together. We’ve lived apart for maybe 18 years now, but we have stayed in touch. Her loss is deeply felt by my wife and me. Rest in Peace, Mary Ann.

Mary Ann leaves her husband, Keith, and three sons, all of whom are grown and married. She and Keith were married for well over forty years, and he now faces a loss that will reverberate through his life for years to come.

Then at 6:30 a.m. in Vermont, one of our nieces bore her third daughter, Harper Grace, and everyone is doing well. We probably won’t see Harper Grace until late fall or early winter. She joins her two sisters who are full of curiosity, hope and love, and her parents, Marc and Amy who are in middle life, devoted to work and family, and spending their own energy as if it were boundless. Welcome to our family and the world, Harper Grace. Continue reading →

When Dementia Strikes Home, We All Need Help

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A review of, Chicken Soup for the Soul: Living with Alzheimer’s and Other Dementias, 101 stories, eds. Amy Newmark and Angela Timashenka Geiger, (Cos Cob, CT: Chicken Soup for the Soul Publishing, LLC, April 2014).  Available online at Barnes and Noble, Amazon, and perhaps your local bookstore.

Photo by Matt, Chicken Soup for the Soul, https://www.flickr.com/photos/dippy_duck/

Photo by Matt, Chicken Soup for the Soul, https://www.flickr.com/photos/dippy_duck/

The editors of this fine book have compiled 101 useful stories of living with dementia. I wish it had been available years ago.

Mary Jane (MJ), my mother-in-law, suffered from dementia for many years. My wife, Barbara, and I aren’t sure when it started; but MJ had been growing less capable, more dependent, since the late 1950s. Continue reading →

Later Living Encores: Ola’s Quilt Shop

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Ola_019

When retirees get to their middle 80s, most don’t want to or can’t stay physically active. Instead they relax, take up hobbies or devote full-time to television. Their conversations often concern their health problems. But there are exceptions, like Ms. Ola Coombs.

Ola had always wanted to have her own quilt shop and she got her chance at age 79. Ola’s Quilt Shop in Lavonia, Georgia opened in May, 2006. This year Ola will turn 87. Continue reading →

Family and Friends at the Pond

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Drew, Alex, Devon

Drew, Alex, Devon

A pond occupies the center of our neighborhood, and a goose and two ducks live there. They have become, well, friends. In most places, geese hang with geese and ducks with ducks, so our pond, with an inter-species friendship going on, is a little more interesting.  Continue reading →

Who Are You?

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Retirement DSC00977

Sunset on Lake Champlain

Who reads these posts? What’s going on here?

This blog is now two years old and we might take stock of our efforts. Two years ago I expected most readers would be retired. Now it’s clear that many readers are not even close to retirement but instead work serving a senior population.

Continue reading →